A rant.
I’m tired of hospitals.
Not tired of hospital births, tired of hospitals.
I find myself absorbing trauma at almost every birth. And not sharing that trauma with who should be the one getting it (the client) is noble, yes but it also makes it double hard because I have to just hold it in until I can come home and process it with my husband, colleagues or a social media post like this one.
The extreme control over births that hospitals are trying to get is exhausting. The hyper fixation on inducing, the absolute distrust in women’s ability to birth, the unfair medicalization of healthy pregnancies and the constant and unnecessary intervention over the natural process of giving birth are getting all of my energy these days.
I find that the information, advocacy and emotional support reach a limit when a provider mentions the possible (or very unlikely) harm to your unborn child. When a person that “went to medical school for many years” tells you that they (it’s always about them, isn’t it?) would feel more comfortable intervening your birth, that’s it. The fear takes over and you’re no longer in charge of your birth. Someone else is, and usually they are the ones in charge because they follow rules, policies and regulations or a much bigger money making machine that only cares about dodging lawsuits. No, the medical system doesn’t care about you or your baby.
I wish hospitals would re learn birth. Look for the evidence. Cut out the dated techniques that have been taught for decades.
Attend a natural childbirth class every month and reset your beliefs. Go back to basics.
I’m tired of finding amazing providers that are as powerless as the client. I’m sick of doctors who roll their eyes at informed consent.
I’m fed up with legal stuff that interferes with what should be the most natural thing in the world.
Hospitals should be ready for people who want a different approach to birth. Some people want to give birth at the hospital because they feel safer there or maybe because they don’t know anything different. But that doesn’t mean they want a birth where they need to abide rules that don’t apply to them.
Yes, I could step out and move away from hospital births. That could solve my problem. But every time I think about doing it, appears a person that needs support. Maybe they don’t speak English, maybe they’re immigrants like I am. Maybe they’re single and victims of abuse. Maybe they’re scared to death about giving birth with no one by their side. How could I say no?
Maybe if we raise awareness about hospitals being so selfish, we could make a change. Not only as doulas but as human beings.
A hospital birth shouldn’t have to ALWAYS mean trauma. Not for the client, not for the baby and in an ideal world,not for the doula.
I'm tired of hospitals.
